we're expecting to receive tomorrow.  

(Forecast:  a coating by the coast; 1 -3" in the western mountains.)

Now, a weather forecaster this morning did say, "On the bright side, it won't last long."    That fellow -who has admittedly forgotten more about meteorology than I'll ever know- really should be careful when using the term "bright side" relative to snow in MID MAY!!!   It is like telling a condemned French aristocrat en route to the Guillotine,  "On the bright side, the tumbrils have new seat warmers."

Yes, we know you've packed away the snow tires for safe keeping until the season's first snow in late August.

Yes, we know that you've already spoken to that dyspeptic, sour-souled, self righteous gorgon who said, "Now, when I was a child, we often had snow in May, so I don't understand the fuss."     That statement, incidentally, is a four-yard-long nose of a lie, unless that person grew up in the mid Victorian era on Pluto.

Yes, we know that meteorologists explaining why this is happening does absolutely nothing to assuage the profound grief you are understandably experiencing at this precise moment.  Of course the realization that it is the onslaught of cool Canadian air really helps demystify the whole situation as we all assumed it was just a renegade air parcel catapulted out of the Australian outback.  

And, yes, we know that no calming voice, reassuring words, scientific exposition, or idiotic e-mails will serve to soothe the inner savage that is ripping through your rib cage at this moment and trying to shatter the planet with a 140-decibel yawp!

So, thanks again for the death threats about the snow, because, yes, we here in a small planetarium in Portland, Maine have somehow figured out how to control the dynamic, sub-chaotic weather systems of this entire planet.     So, please, since it is going to snow tomorrow, will at least one of you follow through with that threat...today?!?