The following stories were reported in today's Maine Campus-the UM student
 newspaper.
 
      1) Rob Howland earns starting role betwwen the pipes for nxt season's hom
e opener October 23.  His progress this season is why,according to Coach Walsh.
 
      2) Senior Steve Tepper,originally at UMaine to play football,admitted Tie
sday that he "still thought (he) was playing football" during the last four sea
sons.  Poor Tep,all those hockey memories;gone.
 
      3) A UMaine statistician was arrested for the unauthorized selling of
 "The Scott Pellerin Story" on Tuesday.  On his way to jail,the statsman was
heard repeating"Pelly for Hobey" over and over.
 
      4) In a most interesting development,it was discovered this week that
UMaine forward Cal Ingraham is,in fact,Coach Walsh's 1-1/2 year old son,known
previously as "Tyler".  Walsh said that he didn't want (MSU Coach/Father-in-Law
) Ron Mason to know,because Mason would have preferred "Tyler" to wear the
Green and White.  Players were shocked at the news but said that it "explains a
 lot".
 
   In other UMaine sports news:
 
      It was announced that Basketball Coach Rudy Keeling was heading to UNLV
to replace Tarkanian.  IU Coach Bobby Knight will replace Keeling after the
NC$$ Final Four this weekend.  Coming with Knight from IU will be Damon Bailey,
who was traded for two UM players.
      In a tragic turn of events,Mahaney Diamond,home of the baseball Black Bea
rs,was washed away following torrential downpours.  Coach John Winkin says that
the field will be ready for play this weekend,somehow.
 
     What a day at UMaine.  All these stories breaking,all on the same day.
Say,what is today,anyway.  Let's see.....Wednesday,April 1,1992. Hmmmmmmm......
   April first,Why does that mean something???? Oh,that's right! Today is:
 
 
    A P R I L    F O O L ' S      D A Y ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
                                               (Be honest,I had you going there
                                                 Didn't I ????)
 
 
                                                 John Forsyth
 
"Be vewy vewy qwiet,I'm hunting Hoosiers!"  -Elmer J. (Bobby Hurley) Fudd
"Oh,I know I'm a louse,but I'm a LIVE LOUSE!!  I'm not like other people.  I
can't stand pain:it hurts me."      -Daffy Duck
 
 
 
 
 
  Please take this as the humor it was intended to be,after all it is April 1 !