Once again -- drumroll please -- I present you with the third annual so-called
awards of the Phinal Phour and Hockey-L.  Even though, despite my best
efforts,
I haven't offended anyone yet (that I know of), I still need to place a
warning label on this year's awards.  The following is meant for the
consumption of those who have a sense of humor only.  If you do not, and
proceed to read it, I offer no apologies for its contents.  Now, in no
particular order:
 
THE YOU MEAN WE'RE NOT HOSTING THE ROLLER HOCKEY CHAMPIONSHIP AWARD:  Goes to
the Cincinnati Riverfront Coliseum which tried their best to turn the ice
hockey championships into a roller hockey championship.  The ice was melting
faster than goals were being scored, and many wondered seriously whether the
blades should be replaced with wheels.
 
THE WHO NEEDS THE PLAYERS AWARD:  Goes to the Cincinnati Riverfront Coliseum.
Before the first game started, they played the National Anthem before any of
the players even came out.  Then, they displayed the score: Colorado - 1,
Vermont - 0.  Hey, who needs the players?  For that matter who needed the ice?
Virtual reality hits the NC$$.
 
THE OFFICIAL SIEVE CHANT AWARD:  Goes to the guy who was drilling the hole
for the goal posts when, pop, he hit the freon pipe, and officially placed
himself in the position to receive the dreaded sieve chant.  "SIEVE, SIEVE,
SIEVE!"
 
THE SOCIALITE OF THE YEAR (DECADE, CENTURY, MILLENIUM?) AWARD:  For the second
time in 3 years, it goes to our ever faithful Carol White.  This time, she
went beyond the call of duty planning the dinner from Minnesota.  Plus, this
year's buttons were as cool as ever -- even if the NC$$ would not allow her
to sell them at the game.
 
THE IT'S DEJA VU ALL OVER AGAIN AWARD:  Goes to all those Hockey-L'ers who
were planning on going to the dinner.  With the first game already delayed
by 40 minutes due to the problems with the ice, and then going into double
overtime, it brought back all those thoughts of a year ago.  Mainly, would
there be enough time to get to the restaurant, eat, and make it back in time
for the second game?  Luckily, the game did not go into triple overtime, and
the second game was delayed by over an hour and a half.
 
THE DUMBEST NAME AWARD:  Goes to the bank I saw while walking around downtown
Cincinnati whose name was: "Fifth Third Bank, Fourth Street Office."  Ooookay!
 
THE QUOTE OF THE WEEKEND AWARD:  The one you've all been waiting for.  For
the first time ever, it does not go to Mike Machnik.  Instead, it goes to
Linda Harrison.  At the Hockey-L dinner during the introductions, Linda stood
up and proudly proclaimed how she has had BC season tickets for 6-7 years.
Then, as she sat down, she said, "And, BU will be back!"  Was that a BU shade
of red you were turning, Linda?
 
THE BEST SIGN AWARD:  Goes to the Colorado College mascot who between the
periods in the championship game was holding up various signs.  The best one
read, "Hey, UM!  How many time outs do you have left?"  Runnerup was the sign
a Michigan fan held up when the refs took to the ice on Saturday: "Hand Pass"
 
THE WHAT THE HECK (OR MOST DEDICATED FAN) AWARD: Goes to Karen Heasley and
her friend, who on Wednesday, while at work, were thinking about going to the
Frozen Four.  At some point, they decided, "what the heck!" and after work,
at 5:00, got into a car and drove from Colorado Springs to Cincinnati.  They
arrived 20 hours later -- one hour before game time -- to see their beloved
Tigers win a thriller.
 
THE WAFFLE AWARD:  Goes to Scott Biggar.  He started out rooting for Colorado
College, but we guilted him into switching to Vermont mentioning numerous
times that he should be rooting for an ECAC team.  Then, on Saturday, he
started out rooting for Michigan, but then we convinced him again to switch
to Colorado College.  Considering the results, he certainly can't be accused
of jumping onto any bandwagons.
 
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Russell Jaslow         |      Potsdam College Bears Hockey       |My employer
Eastman Kodak Company  |     **** 1996 SUNYAC Champions ****     |has nothing
Rochester, New York    |Publisher and Editor - SUNYAC Newsletter |to do with
[log in to unmask], 1986 NCAA D-III National BB Champs.|my drivel.
**** Free The Indy 500 -- Institutionalize Tony George **** -----------------
 
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