Date:         Wed, 14 Dec 1994 08:37:53 CST
Reply-To:     [log in to unmask]
Sender:       Detroit Redwings Hockey <[log in to unmask]>
From:         Bobby Alcott <[log in to unmask]>
Subject:      The Grinch
To:           Multiple recipients of list REDWING <[log in to unmask]>
 
--------------------------- Original Message ---------------------------
I got this off the board at AOL...thought y'all might be amused.
 
THE GRINCHES WHO STOLE HOCKEY
 
T'was the night before hockey season and all through the rink,
not a Zamboni was stirring, not even a wink.
The fans were all nestled asleep on their couches,
while visions of hockey pucks bounced off their haunches.
When up in the Commissioner's box their rose such a clatter,
I sprang to my skates to see what the hell was going on.
When what to my eyes would suddenly appear,
Gary Bettman with horns just like a deer.
Down from the box he came in a flap,
to board up the goal cage with duct tape and Saran wrap.
"Lockout," I cried incensed to the max.
When he said, "All we need is a great big tax!"
Goodenow came in and laid down the law,
"It's a cap in disguise, we can't play no more!"
"Don't you want to play hockey?" I asked in a stew.
They said, "We can't start the season 'til this is through."
So, onward they dickered, for hours and hours,
broke for pizza, beer and a couple cold showers.
It's been weeks and now months and they accomplished nothing,
no scoring, no fighting, not even roughing.
Now here we sit, fans bitter, disappointed,
to hear what we feared would soon be appointed,
the end of the season of '95,
which never started and you all know why,
because the grinches of hockey, Bettman and Goodenow,
couldn't make a deal no matter how long they talked anyhow.
 
Merry Xmas
-Bobby