"Cold Is Relative" - Rated G
 
 50 degrees-New Yorkers turn on the heat. People in New Hampshire plant
gardens.
 40 degrees-Californians shiver uncontrollably. People in New Hampshire
sunbathe.
 35 degrees-Italian cars won't start. People in New Hampshire drive with the
windows down.
 32 degrees-Distilled water freezes. New Hampshire water gets thicker.
 20 degrees-Floridians wear coats, gloves, and wool hats. People in New
Hampshire throw on a T-shirt.
 15 degrees-Californians begin to evacuate the state. People in New
Hampshire go swimming.
 Zero degrees-New York landlords finally turn up the heat. People in New
Hampshire have the last cookout before it gets cold.
 10 degrees below zero-People in Miami cease to exist. People in New
Hampshire lick flagpoles.
 20 degrees below zero-Californians fly away to Mexico. People in New
Hampshire throw on a light jacket.
 40 degrees below zero-Hollywood disintegrates. People in New Hampshire rent
videos.
 60 degrees below zero-Mt. St. Helens freezes. New Hampshire Girl Scouts
begin selling cookies door to door.
 80 degrees below zero-Polar bears begin to evacuate the Arctic.  New
Hampshire Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets cold
enough.
 100 degrees below zero-Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. People in New
Hampshire pull down their ear flaps.
 173 degrees below zero-Ethyl alcohol freezes. People in New Hampshire get
frustrated when they can't thaw their kegs.
 297 degrees below zero-Microbial life start to disappear. New Hampshire
cows complain of farmers with cold hands.
 460 degrees below zero-ALL atomic motion stops. People in New Hampshire
start saying "Cold 'nuff for ya?"
 500 degrees below zero-Hell freezes over. New Hampshire wins the Frozen
Four.
  (D'oh!!!!)
 
Barry "Brooklyn" Singer '77
 
 
"...making the world more productive,
one person at a time..."
 
Barry M. Singer
Training and Consulting
Singer Communications, Inc.
12557 NW 57th Court
Coral Springs, FL 33076
954-757-3320
fax 954-757-6550
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www.singertalk.com